Lemari

Lemarimu penuh dan aku gak suka berjejal dalam ruangan sempit. Rapikan, buang yang gak lagi perlu. Kalau memang gak mau usaha beres-beres, jangan beli isi baru. Makanya cari kualitas dan sesuai dengan yang kamu suka, agar awet. Lemari tambahan bukan solusi, malah bikin mubazir dan mempersempit rumah. Lagian, emang kamu bisa bayarnya? Itu kan gak ternilai.

Bukan karena lemah, tapi hanya lelah selalu mengalah yang berujung pergi dan menyendiri. Dalihnya untuk menjaga diri. Sejengkal dua jengkal benar, sisanya masih misteri.

P.s. Lemariku sudah rapih

Advertisements

Harga Pulang

Tidak ada upaya romantisasi dalam sebuah harap ingin pulang. Harga yang harus dibayar tidak lagi mahal demi ada di rumah. Tidak melulu tentang nominal, melainkan waktu, jarak, juga kesempatan.

Pilihan itu banyak, tapi tanganmu hanya dua. Bukan untuk menggenggam yang kanan dan yang kiri, tapi untuk memeluk satu yang di tengah, agar erat dengan penjagaan yang tepat.
_

00:11
Travel memasuki perbatasan kota,
aku pulang.

Tanggal Merah

Mereka meninggalkan ibu kota, ingin rehat sejenak di daerah. Menghirup udara segar, merasakan suhu yang sejuk, lepas dari padatnya lalu lintas. Berharap menghilangkan penat sehari-hari, katanya.

Dasar manusia, ternyata tidak satu dua yang berpikir sama. Meninggalkan kota besar karena terlalu padat, malah memindahkan kepadatan ke tempat lain. Sementara ibu kota mengosong dan menjadi nikmat bagi mereka yang bertahan.

Titik

Explaining is tiring, hope it’s worth it.

Siapa sangka hari ini jadi Hari Menjelaskan Sedunia. Setelah semua ditekan karena anggapan bahwa aku terlalu transparan hingga tidak lagi punya sisi misterius yang menggelitik rasa penasaran, membiarkan isu jadi tebak-tebakan, yang ada tebakannya banyak keliru. Kan gatal ingin meluruskan. Continue reading “Titik”

Ayo, jangan berhenti.

Ayo buat memori lagi, jangan berhenti di secangkir kopi.
Ayo jalan lebih jauh, jangan berhenti di trotoar megah.
Ayo bersua, jangan berhenti di suara.
Ayo bertemu, kita buat yang baru, jangan berhenti di masa lalu.

Ayo terus bersama, jangan berhenti di sini.

You only come when you need me

Someone asked, “why do you come to me only when you’re in needs?”

Mostly, I go somewhere and do something alone to experience things. Time and experience are precious for me, so I’ve got to spend it wisely. I rarely ask someone to join me, unless I want to share the moment with him/her. I love to share, especially with the closest. I don’t need anyone to entertain me, I need him/her as a person to share with, to know what I love doing. I let them come into my life to understand who I am. So if I ever ask, it means that I really want to spend my time with him/her. If anyone seems bothered with my needs, feel free to tell, then I’ll do as I’m told.

Dear Mas

It’s funny how we used to be “adek-kakak” for the sake of using “aku-kamu” and now the term has shifted to “mas” to mimic your sister, as well as the feeling I had,  has gone for good. Instead, it turned into something beyond. The most genuine I’ve known my whole life, when I only want you to have the best of the best, to do what you desired, be there when you need without being selfless, being open as we become a super best friends like family. Your inspiring bunda feels like mine, your lil’ sister matches my spirit animal.

Thank you Mas for everything. For years you taught me how to be strong, to recognize feelings I hardly understand by the aching in my chest, invited me to whatever projects you held, gave me chances to grow and develop myself, let me have a spot in your life.

You were my inspiration to write, my motivation to learn about short movie production, to express myself, to keep on smiling, etc. Those things internalized and became some things I enjoy. You might be the one who lit the fire, but I’m the one who keeps it alive. You’re the reason why I started, but I’m the reason why I keep going.

Hope you’ll never burn our bridge that has built for years, because I won’t let anyone who came and ever stayed, leave. Once you live in me, you’ll be there forever. Even if one day someone builds a home in me, everyone will still have their place. My heart is quite big to love them all, that’s why I do Priority. Who’s mattered come first. Looking forward to our extraordinary journey ahead! The challenges, mysteries to be solved, things to be made, knowledge to be delivered, etc. Wish you’ll get tons of luck!

Happy birthday,
Love you, but in a different way.

Why me?

I love how people can see through me. Acknowledge my potential, define me in their life, even if they want, put me on their priority list. I love how they can tell something I don’t know or realize, even encourage me to feel what I assumed unrequited as it turns out our feelings are mutual.

It’s simply because it was so tiring to do things alone, to feel some things alone, to fight alone. I rarely feel lonely or sad, as blooming flowers in a pot can bring excitement, summer breeze in a bright morning triggered an unstoppable smile. But when I reviewed what happened that day or that week or that month, I often found myself alone. If everything was supportive and so on, I could just sleep until the sun arose from the back of the east side. If it wasn’t, I might have trouble to sleep or wake up with a clear mind.

Days already have shits, it’s not my job to make them worse.

11:11

Kepada Si Pengelana,

Mungkin kamu gak sadar udah jadi pohon yang besar dan kuat di dalam diri, dengan prinsip-prinsip yang dipegang hingga kini. Prinsip besar yang bercabang, membuat tendensi sebab dari satu hal mengerucut namun jadi beberapa. Entah dari poin mana yang membuatmu jadi seperti sekarang, tolong jangan bakar jembatannya. Meskipun telah sepi, tapi sesekali bisa dilewati. Aku gak pernah menyesal telah belajar. Terima kasih atas semuanya.

Ya, semuanya. Ingat kan aku pernah bilang sangat bersyukur atas kedatanganmu pada tahun terakhirku di dunia mahasiswa ini? Meskipun yang lain berubah, rasa syukur itu enggak. Seperti angka kembar yang diindikasikan membawa keberuntungan, hal-hal yang terjadi aku anggap sebagai bagian dari itu. Meskipun kamu gak percaya takhayul, toh gak ada salahnya untuk tetap optimis tentang kebaikan dan keberuntungan yang akan datang (dengan tetap bergerak, berpikir, berusaha, berproses untuk jadi lebih).

Selamat ulang tahun kamu, semoga damai.

T’s Ideal Sunday

I imagined that this weekend would be used to sleep all day, as I ruined my sleep schedule in past two weeks. But as Mas Reno said “You won’t have a good night’s sleep after graduating, Cha. You gotta work your ass off till you’ve reached your limit and be satisfied with the result.”

Here I am at 5:30 a.m., on my way to Studio 5 at Antasari Street. I’ll do a commercial product photo shoot as a Brand Manager’s assistant. Set the needed properties, associated to build style’s mood, timekeeper, and make sure every detail are checked.

So instead of having pity on myself, I’d like to create a list about how the perfect Tasha’s weekend probably going.

– Cool weather/breezy day.
Yea if one asks me which one would I choose between a sunny or rainy season, I’d answer rainy, but to be honest: I can’t choose. Sunny season creates joy, grows numerous colorful flowers, especially sunflowers, and no wet streets anywhere, but sometimes it’s too hot to be outside. While the rainy season creates contentment, the perfect reason to stay at home.
– Someone to talk to.
Yup, about everything he/she knows, their interest, to find another perspective, exchange values, get inspiration, their struggle to learn from, understand one’s thought through conversation, to define the undefined, opening the closed door.
– Movie marathon. It’d be great to do with the closest.
– Slices of apple, pressed orange, mashed banana.
– Discover new things, meet new people.
– Going on an adventure.
– Strolling in city park.
– Sipping coffee or tea, enjoying its relaxing smell.
Thank god my new Earl Grey Tea, with the combination of black tea, lime, and bergamot smells so damn good. Still looking for a favorite perfume to use, leaving a trace of my smell in every place I walk on, creating memories to people I talk with, reinforcing my identity among people around.